I don't have any tattoos on my body. I've never smoked anything. I don't own a Metallica T-shirt. The only kinds of alcohol I consume, by miniscule amounts, is beer and wine -- maybe margarita, every once in a blue moon. I don't swear every 3 words. I hate parties. I think most of live music is too loud. OK, so the last bit is not entirely true -- I can take my dose of loud music. But most live music is mixed terribly, with kick drum turned up too loud and everything else turned to mush. I'm married, I look tame, I don't do cool handshakes.

So, what am I doing, being a rock n roll musician? A guitarist?

That's question I'm yet to answer myself. I'm certainly atypical, at least by judging the crowd at some of the shows I attend.

But I don't think I'm the only one. I think there are other closet-rockers out there. People who don't need to express their anger, despair and frustration in their lifestyle -- instead they channel it all through music. Music means life, music means everything to us -- yet we don't practice that particular routine. This is not about judging anybody. This is about being honest with who we are.

It is part of my hope to find them, by releasing my own music. I want to beacon the world with the code only I can concoct, the one that only people like me can figure out. You are not alone -- look, here's me, and I really haven't found anyone else like us, either. I'm so glad that we've connected -- let's put the kids to the bed, and talk about bands that saved our lives, out on the porch. We'll have water and OJ, and we'll stay up late.